Woman refuses to cook for her “picky eating” family after they throw away her special dish

Aabha Gopan
3 min readMar 20, 2023
Photo by Yaroslav Shuraev

Cooking requires a lot of effort and time. So I think it’s disrespectful when someone takes just a look at it and refuses to eat. Imagine spending hours cutting vegetables, cooking meat, and more, only to see unsatisfied faces. So, when I came across this Reddit post about a mother, my heart went out to her. Since she didn’t mention names, let’s call her Jane and her husband, Nick.

Jane lives with her husband, Nick, and two daughters, 17 and 10 years old. Jane’s husband was a very picky eater, and this had been the case for the past 20 years. Whenever Jane cooked, her husband and daughters would make faces, gag, take forever to eat, or just outright refuse to eat it.

“My husband is famous for coming home from work, taking one look at the dinner, and choosing for a frozen pizza,” the author wrote.

Jane tried her best to cater to her family’s specific tastes. For instance, when she made spaghetti, her youngest daughter would only eat plain noodles, her oldest daughter would only eat noodles with a scrambled egg on top and no sauce, while her husband would only eat noodles with a particular tomato sauce brand and ground beef in it. If she used any other sauce, even homemade, she would “end up eating leftovers for a week.” So, Jane always made the same recipe for spaghetti.

Recently, Jane’s husband started complaining that they had the same meals over and over again. Jane had tried to explain that she only made a few dishes that everyone in the family would reliably eat, but her husband didn’t seem to understand.

One night, Jane decided to make a shepherd’s pie with a new recipe. It had seasoned ground beef, peas, and tomatoes with a turmeric-mashed potato top layer. Two out of three of her family members would eat mashed potatoes, and two out of three liked peas.

But predictably, her youngest daughter gagged after taking one bite and threw it away, while her oldest daughter only ate a little bit before putting it in the trash. Jane’s husband came home late and said he wasn’t hungry.

Jane was tired of the reactions to her food and the effort she had been putting in for years, and it all finally came crashing down on her. She burst into tears and cried all night and the next morning.

Finally, Jane told her husband that she was done cooking. From then on, he would be responsible for evening meals. Jane would still do breakfast for the girls and lunch when they weren’t in school, but otherwise, it was up to him.

Her husband was upset and asked what he should do when he worked late. Jane told him that he needed to figure it out. She explained that she no longer found any joy in cooking and baking and hated how her family made her feel when they reacted to her food. She was tired of the “yuck faces” and refusals to eat when she made something new, and it broke her heart every time.

The following day, Jane’s husband got up early for meal prep. He was clearly angry and accused Jane of hating him. He didn’t know what to do and thought Jane was unfairly punishing him.

What do other Redditors think?

Reddit is furious that the author let her family treat her poorly for years. They sided with her and congratulated her for finally putting her feet down.

“You have the patience of a saint to have cooked all these years and put up with their dismissive comments,” one commented.

Many women also recollected their past relationships where they had the same experience.

“This sounds like me and my ex and his kids. I stopped cooking altogether. I made sure there was food in the house for the kids, when we had them, that they would eat. Otherwise, I had the food I would eat and bring for meals at work.”

What do you think? Are you a woman who faced a similar situation? Or does your family expect you to cook food but refuse to eat like the authors’? Share your thoughts below.